I know I am in a transitionary phase with my drjerm website, but my mind was opened and I have to get this down for people to read. Enjoy!

As children, we have an excitement of life, possibility, and adventure. As Edmond Dontes in ‘The Count Of Monte Cristo’ said to his unknown to him at the time son, “Everything is an adventure when you’re young.”

But over time, dissapointment, frustration, and being told ‘No’ countless times begins to destroy that excitement. We become destitute and accepting of a life of struggle and stagnation.

Let me ask you something. Have you ever wanted to do something you thought would be a good idea? This can be anything from going on a walk to inventing something. How many of you had this idea many years ago and it is still in you head? How many of you have done something about it in the many years time you have had the idea?

I’m going to go out on a limb and say that many of you still have the idea in your head but have not done much about it. And this doesn’t mean you are a bad person. It just means that your idea does not fit your current model and belief system. So you may be wondering, “Hey this is my idea. It’s a good idea! How does it not fit in my belief system?”

The answer to this is as simple as it is profound. Each person has a view of the world and themselves, along with specific rules that govern their behavior and responses to stimulus. For example, someone who believes strongly that animals should be treated with great respect is going to react very differently to the news of Michael Vick having dog fights than someone who just couldn’t care less about animals.

I’m not going to go into great detail about how each person attains the beliefs and rules for their lives. But the basics of it is that what you think about and focus on is what creates your beliefs. If I spend my time thinking about how great my wife Heidi is (which I do) as opposed to thinking about what a nuisance she is (which she’s not), I am going to have a very different relationship with her depending on how I focus on her.

The problem is we create expectations, rules, and guidelines about how things should be and if anything does not fit this specific mold, we begin to treat it as a negative thing. The answer for you is to create different focus patterns related to yourself and the things you want to do in life. Let me give you an example.

You’ve wanted to write a children’s book for the past 10 years. Let’s say it is about two rabbits that like to play in the yard. But all you’ve done over time is talk about it. Maybe you’ve thought about what a few of the pages might look like. You may have even written a scirbbled draft of the book. But the steps to get the book in print have not been taken.

What is the chance of this book being published and presented to the world? Very close to zero! Unless there is a shift and change in your belief system.

Most people’s beliefs and focus for life is the accumulation of events of their entire life and their response to those events to the present time. The problem is most people’s responses to events are just their initial reactions and are given no thought or reasoning to what their response should be. As an example, I’ve always loathed balloon’s popping. And this is because I heard one pop as a kid and I was extremely startled by it. As this happened over time, I formed a very rigid belief that I hate balloon’s popping (as a side note, I also formed the belief that I hate thunder and lightning). The problem is until recently, I never took the time to think why I was reacting that way – I just hated balloon’s and that was it.

Questions: “Can I sit in a room with a balloon that pops and be perfectly fine? Can I sit in a room where there is lightning with thunder booms going on and be perfectly fine?”

The answer is absolutely (unless the lightning is very close or the balloon is right by my ear – and these cases happen what once or twice in a lifetime?). So I’ve unkowingly put a restriction on myself that has no merit. If I now focus on how cool balloon’s are and how awesome it is to see and hear a thunderstorm, I am going to form very different and much less limiting beliefs about these two things. And this is actually something I’m doing now. Whenever I see balloon’s, I think about how awesome they are. When a thunderstorm starts, I immediately force myself to think, “cool – this is going to be awesome.”

And the mind is an interesting thing. Whatever you feed it, it begins to believe. And if you can smash through stubborness and habit, you can quickly begin to form beliefs about the things you know you should do. And when those beliefs become reinforced enough, you will feel pulled to do them. Is it not true? Some of you reading this may be very religious while others are not. And either of these is ok. But each of those beliefs pulls you to either be active in a religion, or to refrain from activity in a religion.

You can use this to your advantage now. You can examine a typical day and everything that happened. It helps to just write down specifically everything you did in the day. This does require you to focus and remember what you did. However, I can help with this. Most people wake up without a plan. They go through the day just doing what ever they think needs to be done. Those needs include running errands, cleaning, going to work, and honoring commitments to other people. If there is not much that needs to be done, they then revert to entertainment as something to occupy their time. This includes movies, television, and games of every form (online, board, card, etc…).

The problem is that your awesome dream or idea likely occupies a very microscopic portion, if any, of your day and therefore is out of your belief system. This is because you do not reinforce it very often. It isn’t part of you. You are not active with it. If you simply replaced an hour of the day where you were watching TV or playing a game with time where you just sat and reinforced your belief with thought and talk to yourself, over time you would be pulled to start putting into action your idea. How many of you are following what I’m saying? Our actions come dirctly from what we’ve reinforced within ourselves and spent our time focusing on. And this doesn’t even include the evidence of putting your physical body in a peak state while thinking of it!

In a nutshell, this is about a life skill many don’t take the time to hone. And that is the reinforcement of new and powerful beliefs about the things we most deeply desire and want for ourselves. Insert meaningful and specific time daily to just think to yourself how awesome these things are. But here’s the catch that I hope some of you will be able to see. You have to first enforce new beliefs that what I’m saying is actually something that is worth doing! So spend time each day thinking about how awesome and smart I am. This will pull you to do what I say. I’m kidding… only slightly. But I know if you spend time focusing on and enforcing new and powerful beliefs that you will start making time for the wonderful things that deep down inside you know you can do!

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Leap Frogging From Ordinary To Extraordinary

I am going to share my thoughts about what separates the extraordinary from the ordinary. First off, there has been plenty said about what stops people from being extraordinary. Some of these are fear of failure, fear of criticizm, and fear of the unknown. But I do not wish to dwell on the negative aspects. I wish to share what I’ve seen in extraordinary people that sets them apart from others. And perhaps you will find the courage to be extraordinary.

 

The questions you may ask are why should I listen to you and why should I care? Those are two very excellent questions. The answer to the first is simply read and listen to what I have to say. If you don’t find any use for it, I wish you the best. The answer to the second one is a hidden life of great reward and fulfillment.

I believe that a special animal is needed to really illustrate this article - and that animal is the loveable frog! One of the coolest features of a frog is its ability to leap. And my how they leap – some frogs can leap over 50 times their body length, while the ‘average’ frog only leaps about 20 times its body length. If you were to take a six foot tall human, that’s 300 feet at a peak jump! Now that is the equivalent of one of us homosapiens nearly hurdling over the Statue of Liberty!

 

I really hope these links last a long time, but they are my reference for my information about frogs:
http://animals.howstuffworks.com/amphibians/frog-info.htm
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Statue_of_Liberty

 

Think of success, in this case, as the level to which one completes the ideas in his/her mind. Each level requires more and more of a jump to get to. To illustrate, let’s start first with the level of success in where you exist on this earth. I think everyone alive has achieved this level of success, and so we will create the first circle. And look at that, it’s one big party in there and everyone is invited. Congratulations, you have achieved the first level of success. And that is to exist here on this earth. No small feat by any means, this life is meant to challenge us, and just the fact you are here is impressive. But still, everyone else has done it as well.

 

 

Often times people talk about ideas for stuff they would like to do. Whether it’s starting a business, going on a trip, or changing a bad habit, most people have done this. But not everyone. It is a requirement to be able to communicate with others in order to do this. Still, this next circle is full of people, albeit somewhat less than the first. These are people who have simply spoken about something they would like to do and nothing more.

 

 

The next circle consists of those who go a leap further than simply talking about what they would like to do. Perhaps they write down some of what they would like to do, and begin to create a plan for putting it into motion. The beginning of creating the idea is the group of people in this circle and there is a smaller amount of people here than the previous one. These people have actually started to put their ideas into motion for a short time.

 

 

Further still is the next circle and even smaller is the amount of people in it. The next group of people have spent some time trying to put their ideas into motion. But obstacles, challenges, burn out, or other problems have discouraged them from continuing. After a few months, they have given up, but gave a good short burst to try their idea. These are the people who tried for a little while but just didn’t have it in them to keep going.

 

 

The disparity between this circle and the others before it is frightening. The leap to this circle is made by a small amount of people in the world. These are the people who get past the challenges and obstacles in their way to keep fighting to make their ideas a reality. This group of people are creating their ideas no matter what. The amount of people aware of their ideas may be relatively small however, but still, these people see their ideas through to completion.

 

 

The last circle here has a microscopic amount of people compared to the very first. In it are people who have ideas and see them to fruition. Not only that, they are able to get people around the world to be aware that their ideas exist. They capitalize by having their ideas purchased or adopted and make up some of the wealthiest and/or enriched people in the world today. These are the people whose burning desire, planning, and persistence far exceed the averge person. These are the leaders of the world today.

 

 

Do you have what it takes to make the leap to the final circle? It is a journey not many have completed. Most stop well before getting there. But if you have the courage, persistence, dedication, and intelligence to do it, the reward is well worth it. I am taking the leap to this final circle. I am far from getting there, but I am continuing my efforts each day.

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Ah, the passing of time with a TV remote, flipping channels, looking to see what’s on. Before you know it, several hours have passed and you are wondering where the day went. There are many things which each of us can control. There are many things which we cannot control. Thankfully, there is an extensive list of things which we can control

Disclaimer

I am creating a disclaimer first and foremost. There are serious illnesses, both mental and physical, as well as other circumstances that hinder the choices we can make. That being said, I still believe there are things we can do no matter what to control our lives.

Physical Fitness

Yesterday, I finished the P90X program. This is an intense 90 day fitness program, with a healthy eating plan. I saw on TV infomercials for it and decided to give it a try. It’s intense, satisfying, and worthwhile. It’s not easy. Six days a week of working out, stretching, and changing your body. But I believe in myself. And the results have been outstanding. They are a springboard for further physical fitness in my life. Just look at this picture below:

As you can see, I’ve progressed immensley. And sorry, the hair loss and tan skin do not come with P90X. They are a natural result it seems when one wants to show as best as possible physical fitness results. I am just showing this to show that it can be done. I’m a software developer who sits at a computer. And now I’ve achieved completely ripping results.

So What Can You Control?

I don’t want to bore you with long drudgery-like stories. But I want each of you to think for a moment about what you can control. It will likely include some or all of the following:

• What and when you eat
• What you watch on TV – and how much time you watch TV
• What thoughts you allow to go in your head
• How you treat yourself and other people
• How hard you work
• How much you learn and grow each day
• How happy you are
• Your health

Unless I’ve missed something, these are things you cannot generally control:

• The choices of other people
• Global catastrophes
• Time
• Two year olds (any of you have ideas?  I’m listening)

Most of what you cannot control deals with other people and the choices they make.  Beyond that, it is grand scale things.  Just don’t worry about them.  Acknowledge them, and accept them.  Look at the many things you can take care of.  Make progress each day.  My P90X results are that persistent dedication yields great results.  I wanted this short and brief article to give  a pick me up to you reading that you can make progress each and every day!

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Many of you reading this drive at least a few times a week. For me, at the time of writing this, I am working as a software developer on Ancestry.com. I have a 20 minute commute to and from work each day which involves driving on the freeway and in the city (albeit a small city). One of the most bizarre things happened last week while I was driving. I already am very observant of the driving of others around me, and what happened stood out more than most I’ve seen.

 

Entering the freeway

 

Freeways are roads used to drive as quickly as possible to other areas. They are made without stop lights or stop signs, and minimal turns. Generally, you get on a freeway from a city, where there is a road that turns on to it. As you do this, most of the time, there is a stretch of road you drive in that eventually merges with the freeway. This means that the road you are driving on will eventually be part of the freeway, and as such, care must be taken to look for other drivers who could potentially clash with you. And those same drivers must also keep an eye out for people entering the freeway, so as not to cut them off.

 

I was on a freeway with three lanes, driving home. There was a car, preparing to enter the freeway and onto the right lane. There was a car already driving in the right lane, that appeared it would hit the ‘merge’ spot at the same time as the car preparing to enter. All this was happening about 50 to 60 feet in front of me. So I slowed down a little bit as the car already on the freeway was not giving an inch. In the car trying to merge appeared to be a young college male, and he ended up having to drive on the shoulder of the freeway as there was no room for him to get on. I’ve never seen this happen before. He drove on the shoulder of the freeway on the right for a good 15 seconds, before he finally got space to merge in.

 

As such, DrJerm is going to provide you with some tips that will make your driving experience much safer, relaxing, and enjoyable.

 

Relax

 

Realize that you don’t need to zip at a million miles an hour everytime you get in your car and have to go somewhere. It’s ok to relax and enjoy stops at stop signs and red lights. It’s okay if traffic gets a little slow. Just sit back, meditate, and think of things you are going to do. Practice this, and what used to be inconveniences for you while driving will turn into opportunities to think and organize your thoughts.

 

Constantly Survey and Watch Other Cars

 

Driving while watching and anticipating the moves of others has prevented me from rear ending cars, getting side swiped, or getting into dangerous driving situations. Not only that, it has allowed me to be courteous while driving and provide opportunities for other cars to be safer. When I saw that the two cars were going to have a problem with the merge on the freeway, I slowed down, so I was not in the way. Had I just kept going, I would have been right next to the offending car that blocked the merging car, and could have potentially caused an accident.

 

Stay at or Just Above the Speed Limit

 

Driving at, or just above the speed limit ensures that you won’t have a cop with flashing lights startling you while driving. It also means you will have more time to react to situations around you. Avoid the temptation to go more than five miles an hour past the speed limit. Not only is it more safe, it is more gas efficient (if you are driving a gas powered car).

 

Let Others in Front of You

 

It’s okay to let someone in your lane in front of you. Resist the urge to speed up when someone tries to get in your lane. Most people are not trying to get in your lane because they saw your car and deicded that offending you was suddenly their prime objective for driving. No, most people are driving because they are trying to get somewhere. And unfortunately, most people try to as speedily get there as possible. Try enjoying the ride for a change.

 

Keep a Safe Distance in Front of You

 

I keep at least four car length in front of me on the freeway, usually five or six. This means many people will cut in front of me, and that is fine. I just slow down a little and keep driving. When I have to slow down because of an accident or traffic congestion, I don’t have to slam on my breaks. I can hit the breaks, and have plenty of time to slow down or stop. Resist the urge to get as close to people in front of you as possible. Doing this shows impatience, and also greatly increases the risk of hitting them, should the need to stop arise.

 

Please Signal

 

Some people like to drive and change lanes, moving around without any notification that they are doing so. Whether this is because they just don’t care, or for any other reason, this is unsafe. Please use your blinker to indicate you are changing into another lane or turning. Not only is this safe, but it is courteous and just might brighten someone’s day.

 

So Why Does This Matter?

 

This matters because following these, and other safe driving tips, will help you be calmer, more courteous, and more safe as you drive. You will notice that driving is no longer a chore, waiting at a red light isn’t a big deal, and that before you know it, you’ve arrived at your destination!

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Prison walls are a necessary thing. They are a deterrent to keep prisoners from trying to escape. This does not mean it is impossible to escape. Just that it is very difficult. There are other measures in place in a prison to keep prisoners inside. Walls may have barbed wire. Prison guards, armed with guns or batons are stationed around. And alarm systems are in place to keep prisoners from escaping. Even with all these protections in place, a prisoner could still try and escape if they wanted to.  Bottom line, getting out of a prison, especially a top notch, well secured prison is extremely difficult.

 

Our Own Prisons

 

Each person that is alive today faces their own personal prison.  This prison starts off with no walls and minimal security when we are first born.  We are able to leave the prison and move about freely in our younger years.  We dream, and are very forgiving of others.  Change is not difficult in our younger years.  We learn at an exponential rate, and love to explore and think of new ideas.  As time goes on, the prison walls begin to go up.  Guards begin to increase in numbers and watch to make sure we are not out of line.  Suddenly making change in our lives becomes more difficult.  As time goes on and we continue to do the same things over and over, the prison walls become higher and the guards more numerous, making change increasingly difficult and overwhelming.

 

So what happens now?  When life has become a monotenous routine where we are comfortable, but unable to change our routines, what should be done?  First, it must be realized, that change is always going to be difficult and uncomfortable when you are first doing it.  You will likely feel pain, frustration, and possibly diasspointment as you make effort to change.  Your prison will do all it can to keep you how you are right now.  You may even make it outside the prison for a short time, but more often than not, you are captured and lured right back in the prison.  Here are some common scenarios of this.

 

• I had a good week of eating, but I’m back to gorging myself with food now.
• I exercised for a few days, but it was too hard.  Now I just don’t do it.
• I woke up early for a few days, but was too tired.  Now I sleep in.
• I held my tongue while driving, but it was too hard.  I just yell at all the bad drivers now.
• I didn’t swear for a few days.  But it was much easier to just swear so I do.
• I didn’t go out to eat for a whole week.  But it’s too hard making dinner and not as fun, so I go out to eat all the time again.
• I stopped smoking for a few days.  But I needed to smoke, so I gave up.

 

It Was Too Hard

 

On and on, ths list of things can be created.  Particularly, at the beginning of each year, most people decide to try and change things in their lives.  But quickly old habits die hard, and things are back to the same old thing.  Because the change is so different and uncomfortable, that feeling of discomfort and pain brings people to rush back to what they knew before, even if what they knew before was terrible and harmful to themselves.  I find this extremely puzzling, but at the same time understand it.  Why would someone change the way they are doing things when they have been doing that same thing for so many years?

 

Take the person who eats whatever and whenever they want, and never exercises.  This person is likely very overweight.  Getting around may be difficult for them.  They may get sick and be tired quite often.  Their concept of proper eating, exercising, and overall good health may be non-existent.  Yet at the same time, this is what that person knows.  There is no such thing as watching what is eaten.  There is no worry about exercise.  To them, there is no stress worrying about food and exercise because they just do what comes natural.  This person’s very happiness is likely being hindered and they don’t even know it.

 

The crazy thing is that this wall is extremely hindering and limiting.  In this case, we are talking about physical well being and health, but it applies to all areas of life.  What would happen if this person all of a sudden was presented with a dinner with spinach, salmon, and fruit?  What would probably happen are several things.  They would grab the sugar to put on their fruit.  They would take one bite, if that, of their spinach and salmon.  They would then immediately go looking for food that tastes good.  Because they are not used to the taste of salmon and spinach, it groses them out and they nearly gag.  Spinach, salmon, and fruit are extremely good for you.  They have minerals, vitamins, and other useful properties that enhance the human body.

 

Fight Through It

 

The one characteristic that has to be honed to make change, where change is different and difficult is determination.  With determination, you will do what is necessary.  A couple months ago, I began working out doing the P90X fitness program.  This includes a rigorous workout schedule, and healthy/nutritious eating plan, with plenty of food to eat.  The first three weeks doing this was very difficult.  I was sore non-stop.  Fortunately, I had already decided eating the proper foods was important and made that change.  It doesn’t mean I always eat the right thing, but it does mean I seek to eat the right things first.

 

I could have given up the first few days because I was sore and it hurt too bad.  I could have given up the first day exercising, because it was too intense.  But I didn’t.  I kept at it.  I put in the extra effort.  And that extra effort has now transformed my body.  The little bit of extra effort I made is reaping far more rewards than the effort I put in.  Just look at these pictures of myself, from a blog my wife and I are keeping (before is on the LEFT, after is on the RIGHT).  This isn’t even the end of the 90 day program either.  Click here for a P90X picture of myself.

 

Get Excited When Things are Difficult and Uncomfortable

 

When things become difficult and uncomfortable, this is a good thing.  It means you are making a change in your life.  Keep at it.  Don’t give up.  You will be amazed at the increase in happiness as you make difficult changes for the better.  You can be happy.  You can be successful.  All it takes is your own determination and self worth to do what is necessary.  I challenge you to make changes in your life where you are unsatisfied or unhappy.  You can do it!

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Regret can consume you if you let it.  I know from experience.  I am sure that every person alive has many things in their past that they can dwell on and feel guilty or sorry about.  Perhaps you wish you would have done better in school, or even attended school.  Maybe your frustrated with a few bad relationships that never worked out.  Or maybe you look back on the years of your life and wonder what it is all for, and consider all the time wasted.  Let’s take a moment and read about the man who regretted everything.

 

There was a man, when born regretted leaving his mother’s womb and entering the world.  The womb was cosy, he wanted to go back.

 

When in pre-school, he regretted growing up and wanted to be a baby again, so he could be fed and cuddled all the time.

 

When in elementary school, wished he could go back to pre school.  There were half days and life was easy.  Now a full day of school was too much.

 

As high school rolled around, he wished he could go back to elementary school.  Life was simple then and girls were never an issue.  Homework was easier.

 

As the college years rolled by, he longed for high school.  He missed his friends and wanted to enjoy the easy life of living with his parents.

 

As his career began, and he began to age, he wished he could be in college again.  A few more parties would make him happy again.

 

Upon reaching middle age, the man longed for his younger years working.  He didn’t feel as much pain and had more energy.

 

The end of his life approaching, the man looked back at his life.  He wondered how his life was coming to an end so quickly.  He wished that he could start over again.

 

Live in the moment

 

Like this man, we too may often dwell on the past and long for things that once were.  Beware this fools gold.  Our lives are what we make of them.  Choose to enjoy what is happening this very moment and you will never want for the past.  You will look on the past with fond memories instead.  Live every moment to its fullest, and I can promise you that regret will be hard to come by.

 

Handling Regrets

 

I have many things in my past that I could regret.  Some are embarassing, others silly.  Let me share several of these with you, and I do so with a knowledge that some may make me appear foolish or silly.  I am fine with this as I have learned to live with my past.  I will explain how I accept each of these now and with that and a drum roll, here are some of the things I used to regret, but now which I have learned to live with.

 

• Growing up, I was very shy.  Because of this, there were girls I could have gotten to know and increase my socializing skills with.  Because of this, I have had to work hard learning how to handle social situations.

 

I acknowledge and accept that I was once a shy person with little confidence.  Perhaps it robbed me of some experiences that would have been useful, but it was who I was.  I accept that, and all the good and bad that it created.

 

• I played basketball in high school, but never feel I really achieved my potential.  I always felt like something was wrong with me.

 

There is nothing wrong with me.  I am a talented basketball player.  Perhaps my role on the team wasn’t the best it could have been, or other factors contributed.  I used to think of these things.  Now I accept the outcome of my high school basketball career and have since moved on, and enjoy whenever I can play.

 

• I’ve been a little too pushy and over-protective with people in my past, and even recent past.  Perhaps I will have the fortune that one of those people will read this blog entry.  They will know who they are.  I pried and kept tabs on certain people which I will keep anonymous.  I even had the nerve to park my car after one finished a late night date to make sure they got home on time.  My decision making with these people was not the best it could have been and I pushed them away because of it.

 

I no longer worry about how I was too over-protective and the way I was too pushy.  I realized that I just cared and handled it in the wrong way.  I have since changed to a stance where I believe people will blossom and grown and learn, while trying to provide help from afar in the best way I know how.  I know that I am not perfect, but I am able to look back and accept both the harm and good that resulted from my being over-protective, and am happy with my change since then.

 

• I helped start a business with someone, and eventually was hired as a full time employee for a company they created.  Things did not work out at all and the result was a big strain on my life.

 

Several of my past blog entries cover in detail this situation, and my frustration and anger at the time is very evident.  In the past, I had anger, frustration, and revenge on my mind.  I felt betrayed.  There are times where I’ve acted out of anger and frustration towards business partners, in a couple different situations, and though I am sorry for it, I now accept my actions for who I was back then. As time has gone on and a little wisdom prevailed, I no longer feel any regret for this.  They are learning situations.  Whatever the reasons for it not working out, I accept, and have since moved on to furthering drjerm, writing a book, and other exciting things.

 

I know with a little effort and faith, that you can destroy your regrets.  You will no longer have them as you accept them and take the learning experiences and add them to your growth in life.

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I had my first MRI (Magnetic resonance imaging) yesterday morning. It was an interesting and challenging experience, so much that I wanted to offer some helpful advice to others who are having it done.   As you can see from the picture, which is called a closed MRI, the person is placed in a machine, where their head, neck, or spinal area is going to get scanned. The machine surrounds most of your body, except your legs.  In my MRI, I was actually moved a little further in the machine, such that only part of my legs were out of the machine.

 

Why an MRI

 

I’ve had some problem with vertigo, headaches, and dizziness in the last few months. In the past few weeks this has lessened, but since no cause has been able to be found from doctor’s, it was suggested that I get an MRI scan of my brain (the tests are already done and thankfully nothing was shown to be wrong). The MRI is for anyone needing a more detailed scan of the body and neurological systems.

 

What Happens During an MRI?

 

There are two different kinds of MRI’s that I know of: closed and open.  It seems that closed MRI’s are more common.  In this kind of MRI, you are placed on a platform that slides you inside a ‘tube’.  Your body is covered and the quarters are very tight.  An open MRI looks like this:

As you can see, the space is more open, and if I had to do it again, I’d want an ‘Open MRI’.

 

But I want to talk about my closed MRI and what happened to me, so that you may be guided as you prepare and experience your MRI.  I got to the doctor’s office, signed in, got paged by the doctor, went to a dressing room (I was able to keep my clothes that I had, warm up pants and a regular shirt), and finally to the MRI room.  There is a platform and a large machine.  I didn’t think too much of it until the doctor told me to lay down on the platform.  I was given ear plugs and he said some things to me about it, and to breathe and try to remain calm.

 

Eventually, my ear plugs were in and in went the platform.  Once all the way in, this is where the shock set in.  I opened my eyes and I literally wasn’t able to move much at all.  I could move my arms slightly, and there was probably six inches from my body to the ceiling of the tube I was in.  My head had a device placed over it to help with keeping it still, so my head was pretty much stuck where it was.  My heart beat fast, and my breathing increased heavily.  I had to meditate and do it fast.  Being in such tight quarters really triggered a panic response from me.  But I believe this was from not knowing what to expect going in.

 

I was able to calm myself down through intense conecntration and recalling memories of happiness and focusing on my determination and willpower.  But it was not an easy experience by any means.

 

What You can Do

 

I believe if you follow this list of advice, that even a closed MRI experience can be tolerable, and you should do them if you are having anxious feelings, or even if you aren’t anxious, but just looking for adivce:

 

• Relax and forget about any problems you are having.
• Have a close friend come with you to pat you on the leg while the MRI is going on.
• Keep your eyes closed when you can.  I actually had to open my eyes for about a minute as I got a little dizzy during part of the scanning, and was more dizzy with my eyes closed.
• Even with ear plugs, be prepared for loud noise inside the machine.  Expect it and embrace it.
• Take a sedative (relaxation medicine).  You can ask the doctor about this.  Anything to help you relax will be helpful.
• Ask the doctor or your close friend to talk to you while the MRI is going on.  Have them speak words of encouragement, or just carry on a conversation.  With ear plugs in, they will need to speak a little louder than normal.
• Make sure you have gone to the bathroom.
• While in the machine, keep still and relaxed.  Close your eyes and picture yourself in a happy place.  This may be on the beach, on the basketball court, or playing with your children.
• Above all, keep positive thoughts in your head.  Breathe deeply and dispel any fear that tries to enter you.  It is possible to sit still and relax, even in a  tight quartered tube.
• When the MRI is done, pat yourself on the back.  You just conquered a challenge and you should reward yourself with a cool drink, lunch with a friend, or a nap!

 

I hope that some of this advice will help those who are having an MRI, or looking to relate to someone who just had a difficult MRI.  When my MRI was done, after 25 minutes, I was very happy about getting out.  I realized my preparation was not very good for the experience, and if I ever have to do it again, I am now armed with much more knowledge, which will better the experience!

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As time has gone on and I’ve found myself busy doing other things, I’ve been getting ‘pricked’ inside to write more here on my blog.  I know that there are people out there who get use out of what I say.  I can’t promise entries daily or even weekly.  But I can promise, that when I feel I have something useful to say, that I will get it up for you all to view!

 

With that, the latest topic on my mind is what people spend their time doing, and what you can expect to gain from what you are doing. This is a crucial thing if you are struggling with where you are in life or feel that there is more for you to accomplish.

 

Daily Activities

 

I’ve written before about the activites that each of us take part in during the day.  The general range I see from most people are some of the following (myself included):

• Television
• Video/computer games
• Eating
• Going out with friends
• Working
• Building yourself up
• Creating your legacy

 

From the top of the list, I notice most time gets spent on those activities.  As you go down the list, towards the very bottom, the time spent starts to become very small with most people.  There are a few explanations for this.

 

Watching television is easy!  You just have to sit there and look.  And it’s not that there isn’t quality television on.  In fact, I watched Dr. Wayne Dyer on television the other night.  He is an inspirational speaker.  Indeed, he is what I aspire to be, able to speak in front of large audiences and offer them inspiration and advice to get through life.  He is leaving his legacy in the world, and I am sure that he is at peace with himself, while of course facing trials in life like all of us.

 

Video and computer games are fun!  I like to play them.  I have played World of Warcraft off and on.  It’s a game I enjoy playing with friends and I also like building up my characters.  It doesn’t require significant effort and is easy to do for many hours at a time.

 

Eating isn’t too difficult either.  It’s very easy to go to McDonalds and scarf down burgers and fries.  Or to buy ice cream and eat it in large amounts.  Shoveling food in is quite easy to do and is a cause for the large number of overweight people in our country.  The true discipline comes from eating the healthier foods and training yourself not to ‘shovel it in’.

 

Going out with friends is fun!  I see many young people spending time with their friends, having a good time.  They party, go to fun events, or travel and see different sights.  This is also not a bad thing.  Creating lasting friendships is a positive part of life.  However, look at how much time you spend ‘playing’ and enjoying yourself.  Is it what you are doing with most of your time?  There are other activities, while not as fun, that will help you get ahead in life.

 

Working is a requirement for most of us.  We don’t have millions of dollars and can’t support ourselves without paychecks coming in.  Therefore by obligation we get out of bed and head to our day jobs to make ends meet.  This isn’t a bad thing, however, if working is all you are doing, think of what you are missing out on for yourself.  

 

Better Activities

 

Spending time building yourself up, while not instinctive, is an excellent way to progress in life.  Instead though, our habits are to think about work, when work will be done.  We think about our favorite television programs and when they are on.  We think about playing our video and computer games.  However, mentally building yourself up will allow you to handle the trials in life, and also proactively engage in interests where your talents lie!  I talk about building yourself up on my blog and website.  This is done through exercise, positive self talk, and being around those who truly care about you.

 

What about exercising?  Many shutter at exercising.  Perhaps not knowing how to do it presents a fear.  Maybe it’s just too much work.  I exercise two to three times a week.  I keep in great shape and feel good.  I can’t imagine not exercising.  At the same time, I can see how people have a hard time with it.  It requires time and dedication.  It requires making it a part of your life.  If you are struggling with weight problems, it most definitely will mean discomfort.  That discomfort can be overcome.  Make a choice and decide to walk, run, bike, and lift weights regularly.  Combine this with controlled eating, and you will be amazed at the physical change that takes place!

 

Creating Your Legacy

 

Lastly, we have creating our legacy.  Many of us grew up and possibly still with dreams of becoming something.  I don’t think many of us dreamed while we were kids of sitting in a cubicle all day, coming home and lounging in front of the TV.  Perhaps you wanted to be a singer, dancer, performer, or athlete.  Or maybe you just want to make a difference in the world.

 

I know what a struggle it can be to do things outside of the normal routine in life.  From my family to working a full time job, I feel pretty drained.  But I know that a little discomfort and sacrifice are required to get to where I want to be.  I am writing a book, I am on page 140 now.  It’s taken a lot of sacrifice.  I have my website here at drjerm.com.  It takes time and sacrifice to do it.  But it’s amazing to see the results and satisfaction I get when I look back at what I’m accomplishing.  So too can you feel the same thing!

 

It is difficult.  You may have questions about what to do.  Look inside your heart.  You know what things you enjoy the most.  Don’t be afraid to start switching tv time for creating your legacy time.  It’s the best decision you will ever make!  But don’t become too extreme.  Some leisure time is ok – even necessary.

 

The Results

 

Spend most of your time in leisurely activites, and not refining your skillset, and you can most likely expect to not find better paying jobs.  Spend too much time lounging around and eating more than you should and you can expect to be overweight.  Spend no time on building yourself up, and you can expect to find happiness hard to come by.

 

Spend time exercising and eating properly and you can expect to feel great and have energy.  Spend time around those who are motivated and have good character and truly appreciate you and you can expect a great circle of friends.  Spend time refining your skills and being proactive, and building your confidence, and you can expect upgrades in your work.  Spend time creating your legacy, and you can expect your legacy to unfold to the world!

 

The results follow the effort and what you are doing.  It’s a simple formula.  Stretch yourself a little and experience a little discomfort.  You’ll be glad you did!  I know with effort and faith that you can achieve much in this life!

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Every so often in the news, you hear about the winner of some gigantic lottery. This person won $20,000,000 in the multi mega millions lottery sweep stakes. Their life is forever changed and they never have to be concerned about money anymore. Actually, they now have to be very concerned about money and if they do not, disaster, bankruptcy, and running from creditors will be the next step.  Guessing about anything, particularly money, is generally not a good idea.

 

Or there is the night before a school exam.  You haven’t studied and you cram for an hour.  You also cram for a few minutes before the test.  When you get your test, it is the equivalent of you being placed in front of stone tablets with egyptian hieroglyphics written and you are being asked to translate.  In this case you could say, “The tablets say the cows ate up all the nachos and boy did they taste good.”  You could also say, “The tablets say that the Egyptians were an ancient people and had tombs with mummies in them and they built the pyramids.”  The second is more of an educated guess, but in realtiy, in both cases, you are really talking out of your you know what.  You are guessing in all its glory.  You do not have knowledge of what exactly is needed.

Ok, so what’s the problem with guessing?

 

In most cases, guessing is not the most efficient way to approach a situation.  It leaves things to chance and luck, usually with very low chances of success.  Ever taken a test that you didn’t study for and you didn’t know much about?  Chances are you got a very low grade.  Yes, there are some geniuses who can probably wing it and ace the test anyways, but these are geniuses, half of a half of a percent.

 

It is much easier to guess at something right away without doing any research or studying on it.  But in the end, all you have really done is just sloppily eliminated one wrong way of doing something.  I have heard many people give the example of approaches to doing something as it relates to ‘ready-aim-fire’.  I will use this example.  I like it and I think it fits.

 

Imagine you are holding a sniper rifle like the marine in this picture. And you have to hit many targets with this weapon and hit them dead on – or your mission will not be complete. You also have a limited number of shots and a limited amount of time.  Now think for a moment what would happen if this marine decided to just stand up, start pointing his weapon around, and firing at random, hoping he hits his targets?

 

There’s a good chance he would be out of ammunition (the stuff that his rifle shoots), and have missed his mark on most, if not all, his targets.  Not only that, there is a chance that he could hurt anyone that is around him because of the danger his guessing with this weapon is causing.  He may not even realize he has hurt those people either because of the long range of his weapon.  He was just hoping that he hit all his targets and meant no harm to any people that were around.

That’s right, he was just hoping he hit his targets and didn’t really realize he could potentially hurt other people.  This is one scenario that could happen.  And it is an all too common scenario in our lives today.  The abundance of guessing and not having a sure knowledge leave our lives to random chance.  This is a scary thing!  Let’s look at some theoretical examples to illustrate this point.

 

•  I’d like to start a business and become a millionaire.  I’ll just get an equity loan on my house, a small business loan, max out my credit cards, and hire a bunch of people.  Maybe this will work out for me.
• Gosh, I’d like to lose weight.  There’s good foods out there, but I can’t really be bothered to eat them.  Besides, I don’t know how to cook and I don’t know what the best foods for me are or how much to eat or where to buy them.
• I’m so excited to get married soon.  Me and my wife are going to have a wonderful marriage.  We’re going to have kids and live happily ever after.
• I just can’t find love.  Everybody I get involved with is a jerk.  What is wrong with me?
• I just don’t feel good.  I’m tired, feel sick all the time, and am not happy, what do I do?

 

These (and many more are situations in life) are often handled by taking the approach that our marine friend here could take.  And that is to just fire randomly and hope for the best.  In the end, the likely outcome is to be worse off than before and have made no real progress.

 

The disaster of guessing is realized usually after an unwanted conclusion of what is trying to be figured out.  This conclusion may be a business that has failed or is on the brink of failing.  It may be being overweight to the point of being uncomfortable.  It may be after being married for a long time realizing that you aren’t compatible with your spouse or that marriage is not for you.  Perhaps it is seeing countless failed relationships in your life and wondering what is wrong.  Or you may feel sick all the time and generally just not be happy.

 

Regardless of what it is, it must be realized that the majority of us have people in our lives that are close to us, are our friends, or are people that rely on us for things (such as a job or being provided food and shelter).  Be very careful about simply guessing and hoping things work out.  Take into careful consideration all the angles you are affecting with your decisions.  By doing this, you will avoid conflict and unpleasent circumstances.

 

The general point here is that the general way to go through life seems to be a pattern of just getting by and seeing what happens.  I believe the truly successful people don’t do very much guessing.  Sure there may be some trial and error.  But I believe that the great leaders and the people who are really successful in this world, those are the people who are taking a different approach.  They are realizing truths, getting educated, increasing in intelligence, and make decisions with sound evidence and support.  It is this which I would like to talk about now.

 

Our marine friend, with the sniper rifle in hand, can take a different approach to hitting his targets.  He can get into a comfortable firing position.  He can get his balance and focus his eye into his gun scope.  He can be very observant of his environment and any sign of moving targets or targets that are fake.  He can observe where other people are so as not to potentially injure them while shooting.  He can take many different precautions.

 

As he trains and takes all these precautions, his awareness will allow him to have a much better chance of hitting his targets.  Sure, he may not hit any of his targets still.  He may only hit a few.  But he has a better chance to hit at least some, if not all of them by taking the necessary steps to prepare and educate himself.  Making the decision after having control over himself and his environment will give him focus and increase the odds of success.

 

What We Can All Do

 

To reduce guessing, there are many things that can be done.  All guessing eliminators require work.  You cannot sit on your hands watching TV all day, or playing video games all day and expect that you are going to have success in your endeavors (unless you are a video game tester or some profession like that).  This is the hard part.  Even I struggle with it.  I mean, who wants to spend their free time reading, learning, and finding out what other people are doing?  Well, for true success and guess elimination, this is what is required.  The guessing eliminators are:

 

• Increasing education through study of online material, the best books, meaningful collaboration with others, and the observance of other people.
• Maintaining health through proper eating, exercise, rest, and the study of what is good for our bodies and what is not.
• Quiet and peaceful meditation in order to orient what our goals and dreams are.  Careful thought on adapting to situations.

 

These three things are very powerful.  Are they easy to do?  No they are not.  Like I said, I struggle with them just like I’m sure the majority of you struggle with them.  But I know what they are and I take time to do them.  There is no simple quick fix to guesing in our lives.  Each problem has a solution.  But that solution is a whole of things that must be done.  Drjerm exists to provide the whole puzzle that must be put together before challenges can really start being overcome.

 

By educationg yourself, maintaining good health, and constantly meditating and seeking to understand yourself, others, and your path in life, you will begin to see things otherwise hidden.  You will begin to see solutions to problems.  I am doing my blog and website here at Drjerm.  I face challenges with doing it.  I started off by guessing.  But I’ve realized that this isn’t going to work too well.  Now I have a different approach.  The material I create I realize is for people looking for answers in life.  Anything I create is something I believe is a direct answer to questions people are having.

 

Do I still have things to figure out.  Of course!  I am still working on the whole getting visitors to my website and increasing traffic thing.  I find many website owners struggling with this.  My website gets about 15 visitors a day right now.  I would love to increase this to 100 or 500 or more!  To do this, I am coming up with ideas such as business cards I can leave with people, word of mouth through my family and friends, and increasing the quality of material on my website and blog.

 

Does this mean I will succeed?  I believe it does and that eventually I will have a heavily trafficed website and blog.  But it may take a long while and much more education for myself.  I may not see success for some time.  But I believe I am on the right track.  I’ve learned being upfront and honest about yourself is important and I’ve done that.  Doing Google videos is important and I am doing that.  I figured out how to sign up for Google Adsense and I am doing that.  I signed up as an Amazon affiliate and I have relevant products on my site now.  Slowly over time as I discover more resources, I will have more that I can do, and eventually, I will hit that ‘sweet spot’ where things just start rolling.

 

The main thing is if you do not know something, find out what other people have to say about it.  Draw your own conclusions about whether you think what was said is worthwhile.  Make decisions based on evidence where possible.  I know that with effort and faith, that you can avoid guessing and start making powerful decisions!

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( This article is written by Dr. J., my father )

 

It’s six o’clock in the morning as John’s alarm sounds. John had promised himself and his doctor that he would walk for at least thirty minutes each morning, but the bed is feeling too comfortable this morning, so John turns off the alarm and goes back to sleep.
 

This story and many others like it that we all can relate to are examples of inaction, or its twin sister procrastination, that often thwart the plans, hopes, and destiny of individuals.

 

As Nathaniel Howe once said, “The way to be nothing is to do nothing.” Of course, we are always doing something. We go here and there, and we do this and that. The question we should keep in mind is this, are our actions moving us closer to our goals and our ultimate destiny?

 

Why is getting important things done so difficult? Perhaps it is because of all the distractions the world has to offer such as entertainment, sports and recreation, toys, shopping, and the like. Maybe it is because we don’t know what to do first or simply what to do at all. Or maybe it is that we are not motivated enough to get moving now, or are simply just plain lazy.

 

It is true that the world is full of pleasurable interesting things to do. For many the goal of “Eat, drink, and be merry for tomorrow we die” is life’s only goal. For those with true life-improvement goals, however, the distractions of the world can also be quite powerful. It is so easy to get caught up in the thick of thin things. Recognizing and controlling such distractions and roadblocks is a critical step in achieving our worthy goals. Finding successful strategies that limit, lock, or leave/eliminate these distractions is something that the serious reader is encouraged to go and do.

 

Setting a goal is a good start at improving one’s life or the world around us. Not knowing what to do to accomplish the goal means that we did not take the time to develop an achievement plan for the goal. Books, magazines, and the Internet contain much discussion about how to set goals and develop action plans. For example, type “SMART Goals” into your favorite search engine. If you are having difficulty deciding what to do to achieve your goal, then a diligent study of these available resources is something to go and do.

 

Motivation is perhaps the key ingredient in achieving our goals, yet one that is not well understood. Motivation is a psychological concept with no single universally accepted definition which concerns the determinants of intent, effort and tenacity, and the factors that push or pull us as individuals to behave in a particular manner. It involves the complex interaction of our knowledge, thoughts, beliefs and desires, senses, feelings, and sub-conscious programs.

 

When our goals involve things that we love and are excited to do, motivation is generally not a problem. However most goals are not like that. In fact they can be just the opposite. For example, a person who loves to eat will have a hard time getting motivated to lose weight. For such goals additional motivation must be obtained. For this we must take actions that influence or change the internal items listed above.

 

Once again the literature is abundant with ideas of things we can do to help increase our motivation. To-do lists, rewards, deadlines, reporting to others, self-talk, and imagining are but a few examples. The great secret, however, to motivation is the same as the great secret to happiness or the great secret to success. It is simply this – service to others. Abraham Lincoln said this, “When I do good, I feel good, when I don’t do good, I don’t feel good.”

 

Good feelings are positive motivators for other actions that help achieve our goals. In the Bible (Luke 10:25-36) we read about the parable of the Good Samaritan, a response by Jesus to the question – who is my neighbor? Several supposedly good people passed by the robbed and beaten traveler until a Samaritan stopped to help and care for him. “Which now of these three, thinkest thou, was neighbour unto him that fell among the thieves? And he said, He that showed mercy on him. Then said Jesus unto him, Go, and do thou likewise.”

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